The Fight
So, I had a small fight with my boyfriend last night and it is still really bothering me. We do not fight often, but when we do, I always feels as if the whole relationship is falling apart.
This fight, like most fights, was over something stupid. However, one can probably analyze it and attribute it to deeper issues (what those are, I am not sure). Whatever the case, my boyfriend had a difficult patient call him yesterday. Actually, an ex-patient. He had done all the steps necessary to release her from his care, but she called back (apparently, she is legitimately crazy). Anyway, he called her back and she read him the riot act. He handled it perfectly, but inside was mad as hell (he let her say her piece and then got her off the phone). However, the 5 subsequent calls with me were all about her and what a "c**t" she was. I listened, told him he handled it well, and, if nothing else, this should make him appreciate his other patients all the more. I thought I was done with the issue.
I got home from the gym that evening and turned on the TV - the movie "Day After Tomorrow" was starting. I had never seen it and have a weakness for disaster movies (see my blog on Schadenfreude). So, I started watching. My boyfriend called and started the same conversation we had already had multiple times that day. He could tell I was not engaged and asked what I was watching. I told him and he said, "why don't you turn that off." I thought he was joking - turns out he was not.
Ultimately, he got pissed and hung up. I called back and we kind of sorta joked about it. However, he also kinda sorta joked about not wanting to go to Chicago with me for Labor Day (after I had already booked my ticket that day). There was a little tension in the air. I told him I would call him back and he hung up immediately without saying goodbye. I then tried calling him back multiple times and he did not answer, which always pisses me off.
He is very good at shutting down for the first few hours of any conflict and this infuriates me. He finally called back and we talked it out. However, he is still holding the Chicago thing out there - "I will book my ticket when my mood improves."
So, here I sit this AM - still pissed off, wondering what the long-term prospects of this relationship are, and contemplating the dating scene again. Dire - I know. I know that this will resolve itself and, ideally, we will have a good talk about it (always makes me feel better about the relationship). It is funny how a small fight can make you think so negatively about a relationship. It all goes back to the boyfriend index, which is very low today.......
This fight, like most fights, was over something stupid. However, one can probably analyze it and attribute it to deeper issues (what those are, I am not sure). Whatever the case, my boyfriend had a difficult patient call him yesterday. Actually, an ex-patient. He had done all the steps necessary to release her from his care, but she called back (apparently, she is legitimately crazy). Anyway, he called her back and she read him the riot act. He handled it perfectly, but inside was mad as hell (he let her say her piece and then got her off the phone). However, the 5 subsequent calls with me were all about her and what a "c**t" she was. I listened, told him he handled it well, and, if nothing else, this should make him appreciate his other patients all the more. I thought I was done with the issue.
I got home from the gym that evening and turned on the TV - the movie "Day After Tomorrow" was starting. I had never seen it and have a weakness for disaster movies (see my blog on Schadenfreude). So, I started watching. My boyfriend called and started the same conversation we had already had multiple times that day. He could tell I was not engaged and asked what I was watching. I told him and he said, "why don't you turn that off." I thought he was joking - turns out he was not.
Ultimately, he got pissed and hung up. I called back and we kind of sorta joked about it. However, he also kinda sorta joked about not wanting to go to Chicago with me for Labor Day (after I had already booked my ticket that day). There was a little tension in the air. I told him I would call him back and he hung up immediately without saying goodbye. I then tried calling him back multiple times and he did not answer, which always pisses me off.
He is very good at shutting down for the first few hours of any conflict and this infuriates me. He finally called back and we talked it out. However, he is still holding the Chicago thing out there - "I will book my ticket when my mood improves."
So, here I sit this AM - still pissed off, wondering what the long-term prospects of this relationship are, and contemplating the dating scene again. Dire - I know. I know that this will resolve itself and, ideally, we will have a good talk about it (always makes me feel better about the relationship). It is funny how a small fight can make you think so negatively about a relationship. It all goes back to the boyfriend index, which is very low today.......
posted by The Random Gay Guy at 10:20 AM
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